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Lynn Kilpatrick
See
the girl who stands alone
Notice
her inner pain
Realise
that she is shrinking within herself
Look
at the fear in her eyes
And
the nervous way she backs away
Back
into her little corner of the world
Where
she feels she is safe.
This
girl is a victim
A
victim of abuse
Abuse
of the worst kind
The
kind that affects body, mind and soul
She
is so remote
Has
no will to live
Too
scared to tell her awful secret
Feels
that there is no one she can trust.
Her
hair is wild
She
has lost so much weight
And
she feels so unclean all the time
A
shadow of her former self
But
no one questions
No
one cares
As
she wanders aimlessly around
Not
caring what happens anymore.
The
abuse is called sexual
But
it is not just one type of abuse
It
is Physical, Mental, Emotional and Sexual abuse
All
rolled into one
Which
affects that person forever
As
it destroys so much
From
the mind, to the body and the soul.
© copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
You embraced
the world in your motherly arms
You captured
our hearts with your smile.
Now that you
are gone we miss your warm compassionate nature
The sparkle in
your eyes but most of all your love.
The memory of
you with your arms open wide
As you rush
towards your sons to hug them close
With a look of
sheer love and joy on your face
Will remain in
our hearts forever.
You always
shone like the brightest star in the sky
Wherever you
went in all the countries you visited
All you had to
do was smile and touch
For people to
feel better about life and fill them with hope.
With that
mischievous sparkle in your eyes
You bought
light into many lives that were filled with darkness
And hope into
a world that can be sometimes cruel
But most of
all our hearts were filled with your love.
You may have
left us to become Gods special Angel
Your legacy
will live on though
Through the
young Prince’s you gave to us
But most of
all your love.
© copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
When I try to think what I really
would like
My thoughts become a jumble
Ideas go running round and round in my
head
Beating like the drums of the jungle.
What do I want?
Do I want this or do I want that?
I just can’t make up my mind
So I’ll just sit here and stroke my
cat
It seems the easiest thing to do
To sit and think of nothing much
And her fur is so thick and silky
So soothing and comforting to touch
All worries just fade away
For a little while at least
All the tension leaves my body
Leaving me in peace.
After a while of doing nothing
Just relaxing without a care
My cat and I will enter the kitchen
And eat the food we find in there.
© copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
And
I am weeping too
Last
time it was for Hillsborough
This
time it is for you.
Our
dear Princess Diana
With
the heart so warm and true
So
caring wherever you went
And
everything you used to do.
How
can I overcome this grief I feel
Of
the loss of a Princess so fair
Who
always had a special smile
That
was filled with tender, loving care.
A
Princess who filled our hearts with hope
A
fragile rose, so beautiful and rare
Who
would willingly tread
Where
most do not dare.
The
world will never be the same
Without
our Queen of Hearts
And
as we remember your beautiful smile
That’s
when the crying starts.
The
pain spears through to the core
And
a tear comes to my eye
For
a special Queen of Hearts
Our
dearest Princess Di.
© copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
Walking
along, minding my own business
Happy
in my thoughts of the day
Until
the Echo’s of the past
Come
back to haunt me
Bringing
with them, memories
Along
with all the insecurities
And
self-consciousness
That
I thought were banished forever.
Echo’s
of the past
My
train of thought alters
To
the bad memories of my childhood
Of
children making fun and calling names
Making
me feel angry and sad
But
most of all self-conscious.
Echo’s
of the past
Recalled
by malicious tongues
Of
babes in arms
Who
were not even thought of
When
my life was altered
By
cruel words and jokes.
Echo’s
of the past
Denting
my armour
That
took years to straighten out
Sending
my happy thoughts away
And
bringing back my low self esteem
Leaving
me with tears in my eyes.
© copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
My
Lady was bored one day and so decided
we
would travel to distant shores.
“Fate
may ensure we meet our true loves,” she said
“Come,
rich and handsome men await”
So
I packed her trunks, for us to go
And
at Southampton we arrived, with trunks piled high,
On
the first part of our journey to America,
Aboard
a floating palace, to meet our fates, in the land of freedom.
And
it was there, in the lounge, for Valets and Ladies maids,
That
fate took a hand and I met true love.
Handsome
he was, rich, he was not,
Just
one of the valets hired to pamper a Lord.
He,
who had nothing, had kindness and gentleness in abundance.
I
could cope with my Lady’s moans and spoiled attitude every day,
Knowing
that he will be waiting there for me every night, on deck
For
our secret meetings, under the stars, we would walk hand in hand.
So
in love were we, it shone from our eyes and in our smiles.
My
lover, for that is what he became one night,
When
I finally knew my fate was to be with him.
A
sweet tender moment that I will cherish forever.
My
Lady, jealous of the glow in my eyes,
Tried
out of spite to stop those precious times we shared.
But
our love found a way and while the rich danced
We
were walking along the deck, on the starboard side.
Walking
hand in hand, loving each other even more with every step
Stopping
only so that my lover and I could kiss.
Oh!
His kiss, like the gentle touch of a summer’s breeze.
Brushing
my lips so softly, so sweetly.
Looking
into each others eyes, seeing our fate,
Marriage,
children and a future, full of our love.
Glorying
in the knowledge of how great our love was
And
what was surely to be.
Once
more, looking at my lover’s face, expecting to see his smile
But
seeing only a wide-eyed look of horror as he looks beyond me.
Turning
as he grips me tight, I see what our fate is truly to be.
An
iceberg, so close, too close, tall wide and destructive.
“Oh
dear lord in heaven” my lover cries as he rushes me away,
“We
must alert our Lord and Lady,” he whispers as we go below.
And
so we part, my lover and I, to our respective employers we serve.
During
the rush to board the lifeboats, I search with my eyes to see my love.
Of
the Lord and my true love there is no sign
In
the aftermath of activity to escape,
And
all I can do is pray to the lord to keep him safe
And
hope that he is on one of the other lifeboats.
We
all watched in horror as the unsinkable ship sank
Being
torn apart, hearing the screams of the dying,
As
the palatial ship plunged to the bottom of the sea,
Taking
the lives of those who were not allowed on boats to escape.
The
wave that followed the sinking of that unsinkable palace
Rocked
the boat in which my Lady and I did sit
But
as one violent wave hit, I felt myself falling.
Falling
backwards into the ice-cold waters to my fate.
The
freezing waters soaked me, numbing me,
Only
kept afloat by the life jacket I wore,
The
screams from the boat saying, “reach out for my hand”
Where
mingled with the moans of those dying, freezing in the sea.
Being
pulled back in, I shivered uncontrollably,
It
seems fate wishes me to live after all.
I
was rubbed down with a blanket by a Dowagers Maid
All
were trying to stay hopeful, blocking out the cries from around.
At
last the rescue ship arrives, and now we know that we shall not die,
I
sit alone, waiting, for my love to return to me,
Trying
not to remember the night’s events, which started with love
And
ended with the horror and fear of death.
Around
me sit the riches, fretting for their lost worldly goods
But
none of it touches me, for I am still numb.
The
icy waters surround my heart,
For
I now know my love has died.
Not
a tear can I cry, or a sound I can make.
Longing
to scream, at the spoiled young woman around me
To
“stop their whinging about their diamonds and pearls for
There
are things more precious in this world that have been lost”
None
of those words are uttered as
I
sit in silence to mourn my lost love
And
accept that my Fate it seems,
Is
never to find true love again.
A
year to the day that my true love died.
I
stand alone with babe in arms, staring at the gravestone,
That
marks the place where my true love lies.
A
single flower, a rose, I gently place and lovingly touch his name.
© copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
You shook my hand to say goodbye
And as I walked out of the ward, I started to cry.
For I knew in my heart I would never see you again
And the thought of that bought so much pain.
I never told you I loved you granddad
And it makes me feel so sad
I remember I said it when I was a kid
And I took it for granted that you knew I still did.
I remember too how proud of you I was when my class
visited the railway sheds
It was a special school trip and I turned all the
kids heads,
When I told them you were my grandad, with so much
pride
And that you were the number one engine driver on
Merseyside.
Then as I grew up we used to argue
When you would try and tell me what I should and
should not do.
I regretted the things I said later on
And regret them even more now that you are gone.
For when times were bad you were always there
Both you and Nan letting us know how much you care.
All I have got are my memories now you are gone
So I am writing this for you grandad to say you will always be my Number 1.
© copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
Silently
the child weeps
In
the prison that is her sanctuary
No
one knows the fear in which she lives
No
one knows the hell behind the front door.
Her
silent screams for help go unheard
So
she suffers in silence with her fears
“Don’t
tell anyone,” he said, “Let it be our secret game,
If
mum finds out, she’ll be very upset”
That
thought alone seals her lips
From
the pain she was suffering inside
With no one she could confide in
Silently
she screams
At
night, under her bed clothes,
The
tears begin to fall into her pillow
Being
absorbed by the feathers
Like
the memory is absorbed in her mind
She
does not want to hurt her mum
No
matter how much she must suffer
In
her silent world
Of
heartache and fear
She
becomes a haunted child
Not
knowing anyone to trust
Not
knowing that somewhere
There
are other haunted children.
© copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
It’s
getting hard to think
Especially
when all I want
Is
to have another drink
I
don’t really care
That
it numbs the brain
All
that I know
Is
that it eases my pain
The
pain that’s getting worse
Each
and every day
So
that I keep wishing myself
Many
miles away
Because
of the drink
I
say what I think
But
my thoughts only bring pain
So
I desperately need a drink again
Round
and round
My
problems seem to grow
Will
it ever stop?
I
just do not know
My
life is in a mess
And
I don’t know how or why
So
should I have another drink?
Or
just sit here and cry.
© copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
It
is remembered so clearly, that dreadful day.
Listening
to the radio, as the commentator told.
Of
the awful scenes he was witnessing
At
a football stadium called Hillsborough.
The
pain is as strong now as it has always been.
Of
hearing how 96 fellow Scousers were dying, lying on the pitch.
As
their family and friends pleaded for help for their loved ones.
And
how the gutter press tried to kick us while we were down.
Years
later and we have yet to see justice done.
The
families of those who lost their lives
They
are still fighting to finally discover the truth.
Who
WAS in the wrong?, is the question yet to be answered.
Each
time “you’ll never walk alone” is sung.
A
tidal wave of emotion engulfs a city.
That
just wants to see Justice for the 96.
A
city that will not rest until the truth is finally known.
A
city who, as the music plays, remember a spring day.
When
they saw or heard in horror
As
96 Liverpool Supporters lost their lives
In
a tragedy that will remain in our hearts and minds forever.
© copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
Kilpatrick’s on the loos again
Must have trouble with her water
I told her not to drink so much
But well ‘like mother like daughter’
Perhaps she’s got diarrhoea
She said she was in pain
So that big dinner she had earlier
Has ended up down the drain
Kilpatrick’s on the loos again
She really is in a mess
Being sick this time though
Right all over her dress
Kilpatrick’s on the loos again
Drying herself off with the hand-dryer
Promising she’ll never get like this again
God she is such a big liar
Kilpatrick’s on the loos again
Taking with her, her own toilet roll
Not to clean herself up afterwards
But to plug up the peeping hole
Kilpatrick’s not on the loos again
She’s turned over a brand new leaf
See her out on the dance floor
Giving all the young men grief.
©
copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
Stand the Liverbirds so proud
A symbol to always remind us
That there is a silver lining on every cloud.
©
copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
Once upon a moonlit sky
And stars shone all around.
A baby boy was born to be
A star upon the ground.
An angel in his younger days
With hair so fair and eyes so blue.
Grew up to be a gift from God
That baby boy was you.
So handsome and some times kind
When you want to be
As we watch you grow
These qualities we see.
Thoughtful and loving
In all that you do
There’s pride in our eyes
When we look at you.
©
copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
I’m on my
way to nowhere land
Looking
for the said same nowhere man
To hear if
he now has a point of view
On what I
could possibly, maybe do
To escape
the madness of this world we live in
Hoping to
meet the man who could not win.
I’d like
to see just where he lives
And just
how peaceful it really is
Maybe I
could one day move there
Live a
life without a care
Not really
feeling sad and lonely
As there
is someone not far away, someone like me
Mr nowhere
man
Tell me
what you can
Tell me,
where are you?
I can’t
see what you do
Tell me
where you go
For I just
don’t know.
I want to
live in a land like you
Not
needing to think and with nothing to do
Seeing all
but saying nothing
Not caring
if anyone hears you sing
Songs out
of tune and out of time
There is
no reason to this rhyme
So I think
I’ll finish at the end
With my
regards to you I send
May I
visit you sometime again?
When my
life is such a pain
Until that
day does arrive
I will say
to you, Goodbye.
©
copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
Beautiful woman with her life cut short
Just when she had finally found happiness
So tragic, so sad, so much I grieve for her
Diana, Princess Of Wales and Queen of our Hearts.
In the darkest hours she bought light into our lives
In her darkest days she kept a smile on her face
Even though at times she felt her heart was breaking
She would cover her unhappy thoughts, just for us.
Then suddenly away she went up to the heavens
No one could really believe she had gone
Now as the stars in the night sky spell out her name
We can say with pride that she was our English Rose.
How deeply we mourn you
Every minute, every hour of every day
The pain and shock has lessened
But will always remain in our hearts
You were more than The People’s Princess
You were our hope in a cruel world
You were the light in the dark
You were Our Queen Of Hearts.
©
copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
Poetic - Justice so unfair
Policemen
pleading for
Order
amongst the crowd who are
Enraged
that no one realises that they are in
Trouble
behind that fencing
Irritated by
the fools who are still putting people in there
Crushed
and trampled on by their fellow supporters.
Just
minutes into the match
Under
pressure from those behind
Sanity
disappears, as the desperate need to survive takes hold
Trampled
on by others in their quest to escape the madness
Inches
away from death because of one man and his
Crazy
decision which was the cause of the madness which
Ended so
many lives
Still the
memories go on
Only time
will heal the pain
Upset on
each anniversary
Never
forgetting that day
Feelings
so raw and tender still
And the
nightmares keep awaking me of
Innocent
lives trampled on by tragedy and
Ruling
judges who let the guilty walk free
©
copyright owned by Lynn Kilpatrick
QUIET THOUGHTS UNSPOKEN FROM A DAUGHTER TO HER MUM
There are
times when I want to scream and shout abuse
But I know
deep down inside it would be of no use
For
talking to you is like hitting my head against a brick wall
In fact I
wonder why sometimes I talk to you at all
When you
start annoying me I grit my teeth and bite my tongue